- A fairly common reaction to several threats (disrespect, immorality, not getting what we want …). Mostly, I believe, anger is a result of injustice. And in that case, I believe it is a righteous anger. Perhaps that is not biblically accurate, because I don’t know what the biblical definition of righteous anger is (Mental note: check that later).

Anyway, anger is not a bad feeling. We were created with emotions, and we just have to figure out how to use them, finding the balance between not controlling them and not letting them control us. Righteous anger is not sinful. Jesus got angry. It motivates us to be there for people facing distress, and hold others accountable for the injustice they’ve done.

These days, there’s a lot of injustice. We live in a fallen, broken world. But He is ever merciful, ever faithful. We just don’t see it. We should be angry, we should do something. Yet a wise woman asked me this question, “Are you angry about the situation or God?” And that made me realize something about myself: I get angry with God.

WHY?

It was not His fault that we sinned and fell. He warned us to stay away, but we could not resist. So we fell. And now we see all this brokenness around us and we are angry at Him for what is happening, but it is our fault. And some things happen that break our heart and that seem out of nowhere. Yes, there’s a lot of pain, but who are we to put our wisdom above God’s wisdom?

He is not punishing us. He has different ways of drawing us to Him, and we know through Jesus, that He is glorified through suffering. When everything else is stripped away from us, only He remains.

Sad, but true. Because of our sin, sometimes that’s the only way.

This reminds of the book of Job. Job suffered a lot of loss, and God continually tried to reach out to him and help him through it. Job questioned, he got mad, he didn’t turn away from that. Then God got ANGRY. He had had it. Who was Job to question God? What understanding he had was given to him by God. What gave him the right to put that gift over infinite wisdom?

Job 38 and 39 are about God comparing His wisdom to Job’s. I wanted to type them out but they’re far too long. Maybe I will, in another post. But they are a very good read, beautiful and insightful.

I am barely crawling towards You when I should be running, when I want to be running. I am easily distracted from You when I don’t want to be. I am falling into the trap of comparing my faith to others’. Result: constant feeling of inadequacy and anxiety over not doing better, of being better for you.

COMPLETELY FALSE AND UNHEALTHY THINKING. You died to cover the debt of our sin, washed us clean …. yet I stumble and I feel undeserving to be sharing good news with people. I have difficulty accepting Your grace … Funny thing is, I didn’t feel that way last year. Back then, the last thing I wanted was to hide myself from You (or at least make myself think that I am, because I never could).

I wonder what went wrong.

I want to go back to last year, even though I know bigger and better things are awaiting me. Your work in me has barely begun.

How do I go back to running to You?

This is amazing. Watching this made my day and it hasn’t even started yet :)

I love this post by my friend Maddison. Being currently dissatisfied with my life, it was a comfort to read. It’s always a comfort to have truth told to you :)

maddisontobin:

I have revelations sometimes…not often so when it happens I feel like I have to share.

I was just sitting in my room thinking, praying. I was thinking about my life and what it has been like the past couple of months since I have been home from Lebanon. When I returned I was so eager to find a…

Third blog I’ve worked on in a year. I’ve been having writers’ block and constantly worrying about what should and should not be posted online. Today, I decided the fear is gone! I consider myself to be a person who does not hold back and freely expresses thoughts and emotions. Why should it be any different when it comes to my blog?

I am really looking forward to this. I have tried both wordpress and blogger, and I although I really liked blogger, tumblr and I are going to be good companions. It is not at all rigid or structured and will allow me to be as random as possible. I look forward to blogging about my daily life, about the joy that one feels when accepted into the family of God through Christ, and how that has impacted me.

Also looking forward to hearing from future readers!

Much love,

Carmen